This is the second installment in a series on Navigating mental health disorders in a strict religious environment (SRE).
Men in leadership positions that remind those below him that he is in charge… are not leaders, but bullies. (unknown author)
Much thought and discretion has gone into this over the past few weeks. A leader should be humble enough to bring people into his fold, not because he can teach them something, but so that they can be an asset to the group. I believe that the majority of leaders in these groups have the best interests of their flock in mind and lead with good intentions, compassion and integrity.
However, in some strict religious environments (SRE’s), this is completely not the case. In fact, there a few in leadership positions that get intimidated when someone possesses a gift, skill or talent they do not possess themselves. Perhaps that individual has a spiritual ambition, unique testimony, or experiences in life that the leader did not, and therefore does not understand, nor do they want to. These types of “leaders” tend to prey on folks like this, as they may become a threat to their leadership and authority. They fear these types of folks may take on a “following” of their own… and leadership in a SRE simply can’t have that!
Leaders like this often become addicted to control, to the point of being narcissistic. They hound such people, undermine their worth, manipulate the victim to think they are in need of great improvement or are not worthy. They insist there are areas of that person’s life that need improvement before they are “good enough.”
They may deploy tactics like convincing the victim’s spouse they are living in some unknown sin or corrupt lifestyle. Spreading rumors to others in the group, under the guise of unspecific “prayer requests.” Making side comments among small, but influential crowds that he feels “so sorry for his family” or if only he would “surrender his will.”
I’ve seen many of the above tactics used to tear a person down and keep them under control, given false pretense they have no one else to turn to for help, therefore they are kept on a short leash. That leader will make references to Bible scripture how they are responsible for the “flock” and their word and decisions cannot be questioned. In fact, many will only admit they were wrong only if it casts them in a good light! Roll that around in your head for a bit…
More on this in a few days. God bless! – Steve
Milepost 81 