This post is what I hope to be the first in a series of short essays: Surviving in a strict religious environment (SRE) while struggling, often secretly, with a mental health disorder. This is a collection of my experiences, as well as observations of others that have struggled as well. As a full disclaimer, I am not reflecting on any one person or group, nor do I expect pity. This will not be a “tell-all” investigative journalist piece (we have plenty of that already!). Much of this is based off many years of journaling and from a book draft I cannot bring myself to publish just yet… but we will get there!
I am sharing this for a variety of reasons:
1- I want to bring awareness to this sensitive subject, and also the importance of having mental health disorders diagnosed & treated by a professional in that field. Not an untrained pastor in a SRE that doesn’t believe that it exists, or downplays the issue, or some “self-ordained” individual that fancies themself a counselor, who gets their jollies from prying into areas of your personal life that are not pertinent to, and/or are harmful to your state of mind. There are many out there, I could tell stories! Along with this, we have family and friends who may mean well, but are quick to tell you to “snap out of it” or “just cheer up” or my personal favorite- “have a cup of coffee and pray about it.” (Thanks aunt Karen. I’ll get right on that. *sigh*)
2- With the above, I have seen leaders in SRE’s are really quick to paint a target on your back if you disclose you are struggling. They don’t understand it, obviously never suffered from it themselves, and they do not want a “weak link” in their fold. This did not end well with me and many others. I know of situations of good, hard-working men who simply burned out from a heavy workload. The leaders of his particular group did more harm than good by “counseling” him, and concluding he had hidden sins that needed confessing. In one situation, a man who suffered with anxiety all his life, admitted to his SRE leaders to looking at a glamour magazine at the checkout in the grocery store for longer than a half-second. Therefore he must surely have a sexual/lust issue. That’s a heavy accusation for a man that has “nerve issues”!
3- There is no shame in getting professional help! And there is no shame in admitting you need said help. If you know me, I often think that solid common sense is often replaced by college degrees (“I am smart papers”). Well, this is one field where solid education and training is much needed. An experienced professional is able to diagnose the underlying issue and get you on your way to a treatment program, if needed.
4- Piggybacking the above, if you do seek out professional help, you are not immediately placed on medication. Using medication is ultimately your choice. Getting continued treatment or therapy is also your choice, unless you get yourself in trouble and it becomes mandatory. Many, many times simply knowing what is going on and why it’s happening is half the battle.
Stay tuned and may God bless – Steve
P.S. as always, enjoy the train videos!
Milepost 81 