At the age of 17, I made a big change in my life and joined the plain community, specifically the Dunkard Brethren Church, a decision I do not regret. Nearly 25 years later, after cycling through both the Mennonite and conservative Brethren circles, after many hurts to myself and much frustration to those around me, our family was gently “pushed” out. Our exit did not go smoothly and we still bare scars of betrayal and frustration.
In hindsight we should have made our exit as quiet as possible (which is another story for another day). But my wife and I were seeing some trends of emotional and spiritual abuse under a very controlling and narcistic leadership. We spoke up to church leadership about what we heard from other victims- and there is where it all headed south.
When we finally did make a decision to leave and align the family with what would have been at the time a Church of the Brethren congregation, the attacks started up. Lies and accusations. Falsehoods and half-truths. My wife was accused of being a poor mother. I was accused of being a dead-beat father. I can handle being stabbed in the back a few times- but even I eventually bleed out.
When the attacks on the family stopped coming from our former church, our school picked up the cause and took it to whole ‘nother level: our children’s’ teachers abused their privilege of being a “mandatory reporter” and made numerous false claims to Child Services. I was accused of being a drug addict, my wife was accused of not providing food & meals for the children. And it didn’t stop at that… the hits just kept coming. The caseworker with Child Services, after visiting the home twice in a few days, finally told us not to worry, they know who was making the false claims and put a stop to it… It was obviously was a hoax. Child Services wouldn’t bother us anymore.
The ironic part we learned about the Mennonites? They have their own schools so the government can’t dictate what they do… but yet they use the government when it’s convenient to forward their agenda. Fancy how that works! Unfortunately, that wouldn’t be the end of our troubles.
To be continued….
Milepost 81 