If we all were honest, we all want people to care about us. Be it in time of need, when we may be sick or injured, suffering the loss of a loved one, or facing one of life’s many challenges… we all want someone to acknowledge our hardship no matter how great or small.
I had to think back when a bombshell of a difficult challenge dropped on my wife & I, and the entire family for that matter. It was a shock, obviously, but we quickly realized we needed to piece a puzzle back together. A puzzle where there was no box with a picture on the front to discern what the finished puzzle was supposed to look like. But we sat down at the table and started piecing it together anyway.
Many, many months later, that puzzle still wasn’t finished. And we wondered if it will ever be. We often wondered if some pieces aren’t missing and so it may never be complete. But along the way, we had a few people sit down across from us and help us with that puzzle, people who truly cared about our family situation. Some of those people faced the same circumstances themselves at some point in the past. A few were currently going through it. They didn’t ask questions, didn’t ask about all the “greasy” details, just sat across from us and helped up chip away at the puzzle. Perhaps they knew what the finished puzzle was supposed to look like, perhaps they didn’t and were eager to see for themselves.
Then there were those who just stood behind us, looking over our shoulders as we worked away at the challenge in front of us… they weren’t there to help with the puzzle. Initially, they may have offered some half-hearted words of encouragement, maybe an “I’m so sorry…” which were quickly followed with “I knew this would happen” and “I told you so” and “if only you would have…”. They didn’t care about the puzzle, didn’t care what it would look like, just that the puzzle was in pieces and they wanted to know the details as to why. Details we didn’t have, nor answers to their unsolicited questions. It became obvious they were more curious than caring, they were there for the “inside scoop”.
In conclusion, as a friend, family member and/or fellow Christian of someone who us struggling, are you willing to sit quietly across from someone and help put that puzzle back together? Many times over the years I have seen the above scenario played out. Many will show up to the table. A select few will sit down, silent, lending a listening ear. Yet pushing forward to help with the puzzle.
Others will stand behind, looking over your shoulder, asking why the puzzle is in pieces, critical of your actions, your life’s choices and offering no help with the puzzle in front of you. Are you going to sit at the table and be productive? Or stand behind and be critical?
may God add His blessing – Steve
Milepost 81 